Advanced Procrastination
Period 1 • Room 404
72%
3 assignments “in progress” since September
Avg: C+ • Mood: Struggling
Intro to Breathing 101
Period 2 • Room O2
101%
Extra credit for existing
Attendance: 99.9% alive
History of Missing Assignments
Period 3 • Room Late
37%
12 missing • 1 turned in at 3:00 AM
Teacher comment: “Interesting strategy.”
Algebra 0: Numbers Are A Suggestion
Period 4 • Room √-1
69%
Group project where nobody grouped
Test avg: 47% but “curved”
Lunch Period (Honors)
Period 5 • Room Café
115%
“A” in Speedrunning the Pizza Line
GPA booster • Snack-based curriculum
Emotional Damage Studies
Period 6 • Room Everywhere
88%
Final project: “Why am I like this?”
Participation: Overthinking daily
This is not a real gradebook. This is a safe sandbox. Nothing here is real, including “Advanced Procrastination” (probably).